Childhood trauma can cause problems later in life. One may say that as an adult, a person’s formative years are firmly in the past. Or, to put it another way, they are adults today, and the events of the past don’t matter.
Even if it could look that way, it doesn’t necessarily follow that this is the case. There is a possibility that what they went through at this point in their lives is still influencing them today.
However, given how long it has been since this time in their lives and the defences their mind has put in place. It may be impossible for them to make the link.
With this perspective, individuals won’t be able to feel hopeful, much less change their lives, if they lead a life that is anything than fulfilling.
They will resemble someone who is cut off from the outside world, stranded on an island in the middle of nowhere.
A Closer Examine
If they were able to take a step back and think about their experience, they could realize that they don’t feel at ease in their own bodies. Being inside their thoughts seems more comfortable, though.
Additionally, they prefer their alone time to that spent with others. They might be able to connect with who they are when they are by themselves, but this connection might be difficult to make when they are around other people.
They may see that they have a propensity to put on a show when they are with people, which causes them to become estranged from their authentic selves because of childhood trauma.
This suggests that their consciousness will shift from being internal to becoming externally focused.
This means that how they appear will not accurately reflect who they are, however not everyone will be aware of this. They probably mirror what they think and what they think others want them to be in who they are.
They might appear to be generally laid-back and even submissive, and they might typically agree to anything that another person requests. They are most likely to say “no” infrequently, if at all, and if they do, they can find it quite awkward.
They will likely act as a doormat and are accustomed to being raped, which is an understatement. As a result, they will inevitably suffer psychologically, emotionally, and physically because they are constantly meeting the demands of others while ignoring their own.
It won’t be a surprise if they want to be alone if this is what generally happens when they are with other people. It is obvious that this will distance them from their fellow humans, but it will also protect them from being exploited.
This demonstrates that they don’t think they can defend themselves in front of other people, leaving them with only one self-defence option: seclusion.
Additionally, this demonstrates that they don’t feel secure enough in their bodies to be in them around other people, which is why they automatically detach from them and become too preoccupied with other people.
The Secure Area
Being in their body should make them feel protected, which would prevent them from having to isolate themselves and enable them to stand up for themselves and say no when it’s essential.
But without this sense of inner stability and protection, individuals are compelled to withdraw into their minds.
Because of this, their thinking, not their body, serves as their safe refuge. To take an analogy, imagine having two rooms: one vast and filled with activities, the other small and filled with just one activity, and you spend the most of your time in the latter.
What is happening?
Why someone wouldn’t feel safe and confident in their body, or be able to stand their ground and defend themselves, may seem weird at this point. However, this can show that they were abused frequently as a result of childhood trauma.
This would demonstrate that their caregiver(s) did not view them as a unique individual with needs, feelings, rights, preferences, and wants; rather, they would have been treated no differently from an appliance but with far less value.
This would have prevented them from getting the attention, love, and care they required to mature and develop properly.
A State of Great Vulnerability
They wouldn’t have been able to stay connected to their true selves, their bodies, or to build a sense of safety and security if they hadn’t been treated like actual human beings with needs, feelings, rights, preferences, and wishes. The only place they could have felt safe would have been going into and being in their head.
They might have been able to use their rich imagination and creativity as a result of this. On the other side, their body would have been perceived as their caregiver’s property, over which they had no authority.
Not a Choice
They would have lost the ability to protect themselves both then and today because their fight or aggression impulse would have split off.
However, they would not have been able to change the situation because at this point they were helpless and completely dependent.
There was nothing they could have done at the time of childhood trauma; they were a sitting duck. All they could do was split apart and possibly isolate themselves, which is exactly what they did.
If someone can identify with this and is prepared to make changes in their life, they might need to seek out outside assistance. This is something that can be done with a therapist or healer’s help.